po·lar·i·ty: the state of having two opposite or contradictory tendencies, opinions, or aspects.
Polarity is everywhere.
It’s normal and widespread in nature. Daylight and darkness. Damp rainforests and dry deserts. Minuscule microbes and gargantuan land and sea mammals.
Even in our daily lives, 2020 gave us polarity in spades. From starting off a new decade with joy and hope to a pandemic turning everything upside down ranging from inconveniences to devastating loss.
A US election that polarized the nation.
Opposing viewpoints about race in America that reached a boiling point.
Contradictory opinions on mask wearing and reliability of scientists and physicians.
What 2020 taught us about polarity is that it’s normal, natural, and cannot be avoided. Polarity is not going away anytime soon. In fact, there will always be polarity. If you have a strong passionate opinion about something, there will always be somebody who is equally passionate about the polar opposite viewpoint.
What 2020 taught us is that polarity is not the cause of our problems.
The cause of our problems is how we choose to react to polarity.
It is normal that those with opposing perspectives can cause us to feel anger, fear, and sadness.
What we choose to do with those emotions though is completely up to us.
Take a moment to slow down and process why you feel what you feel regarding the opposition’s viewpoint. Then, choose how you want to proceed.
Do you want to let your strong emotions turn into hate and assumptions?
Or do you want to come from a place of love and seeking to understand?
The latter choice takes a lot more work.
Coming from a place of love and understanding does NOT mean surrendering your viewpoint or agreeing with the opposition. Rather, it puts you in a much more healthy position to double down on your efforts to fight for your stance. In addition, understanding why the opposition feels the way that they do can help you increase empathy and learn things about people that you never knew.
When it comes to polarity, compassion and empathy go a long way. It does not weaken your case, it strengthens it.
Polarity exists within us too.
What the Enneagram (an awesome personality and motivation system of personal development I use in all of my work) teaches us is that any of our strengths in excess can become a weakness.
We all have default patterns of acting, thinking, and feeling that keep us stuck. It is the polar opposite of these patterns that can get you unstuck.
For example, the Enneagram 7 whose motivation is “to experience it all” and is an adventurous visionary may find himself starting many projects and finishing few. When he explores the polarity of the Enneagram 1 whose motivation is “to be perfect and do the right thing”, he can find more freedom by following through on a project with structure, discipline, and high standards.
Or the Enneagram 2 whose motivation is “to be liked and appreciated” by being warm, generous, and helpful. They usually have a hard time saying “no” and setting and adhering to healthy boundaries. When she is able to step into the opposite pole of the Enneagram 8, she can be assertive, decisive, and establish healthy boundaries that can still powerfully serve others as well as taking care of herself.
What 2020 taught us is that polarity is everywhere.
Polarity exists in nature.
Polarity exists in opinions regarding the current state of affairs in the world.
Polarity exists within you.
In 2021, I invite you to explore the polarity within yourself, which will help you improve your relationship with the polarity that exists in the world today, which will help you define the role you want to play in the next chapter of our human story.
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